Size Matters; or, Matters of Size

I've seen a lot of cocks.

Big ones, small ones, cut, uncut - I have to stop, I'm reminding myself of the Cheech Marin "hairy pussy, scary pussy, dog pussy, chicken pussy" scene from From Dusk Till Dawn, a movie I ruined for all my male friends by screaming with horror when QT drinks the tequila off Salma Hayek's foot. I mean, she's been walking around barefoot in a Mexican whorehouse, for chrissakes! Shit, I digress again - anyway, dick is dick.

The owners of the smaller half of the "Cocks Seraglio's Seen" subset have all been deeply paranoid about their penis size. They wax self-deprecating; Oh, this little thing? You're just moaning like that to make me feel better about it... Or they project; I bet you wish this was bigger. They do all the things men with penile insecurities do. You may even be one of these guys.

Well, there is plenty of evidence that size does not, in fact, matter all that much. But just like any other insecurity, that doesn't matter one damn bit.

Still, I have a few thoughts on the matter. And the usual filthy pornographic anecdote, yay!

Big cocks are nice, yes. Small cocks are also nice. Both have their pros and cons, and a clever person can make the most of whatever they've got (or are presented with). I'm not a package-checker; if it's reasonably hard and scrupulously clean it's ideal!

Big cocks are the media's darlings. They have porn genres and they get all the press. Reading CraigsList's Casual Encounters section you'd think every man out there was sporting an anaconda in his pants. I like them too - being filled up is very nice indeed, and they're pretty cool to look at. But big cocks have a number of drawbacks too. A few of my personal complaints:

- I can't go down on them very long or my jaw hurts. Also, no room to move my tongue if they're thick. I can deep-throat long ones, but not very much or my eyes start to water, which is deeply unappealing.

- Big cocks rarely get anal access. Eek!

- The following plaintive howl - Aaaagh! Stop squeezing! You're crushing my dick! Sorry, Trigger, but I have a fairly tight pussy and I do a lot of Kegels. You make me come with that thing, you deal with the consequences.

- Big cocks frequently give their wielders the idea that they are somehow exempt from foreplay and finesse. The sheer size of their spam javelin should be sufficient to reduce women to slavering fuck-demons, and its simple insertion should induce multiple orgasms. I need say no more.

- I can take a big cock. I can enjoy it for a while. But then... I get sore. No more pussy for you, Trigger! And for a day or so afterward, if not longer!

Now, small cocks? Once you get past the insecurity issues, small cocks are great! I have had a lot of fun with the smaller cocks of my acquaintance. A few highlights:

- I can go down on them forever, and with a lot more freedom to be inventive. Deep-throating is actually fun with small cocks.

- I can fuck all night and all day if he's up for it. I'm not a fan of endless nightmare Kabuki sex, but repeat performances over twelve hours or so are definitely my speed.

- Small cocks are fun for anal as well.

- And they like it when I squeeze while coming. Or while not coming. Or, you know, whenever.

There should be small-dick porn movies. I know there are a few small-dick-oriented porn sites out there, so why not a small-dick genre? I asked Blowfish if there was a line of movies I didn't know about, figuring they'd seen more porn films than I have. They said "We haven't seen any, but that's a really good idea!"

The biggest cock I've ever met was Kong. He is attached to the nicest guy ever, Niob. Thick and long, Kong is a fucking monster as well as a challenge, like Everest. A challeneg, I might add, that I was eager to accept.

Niob made me come very nicely, with hands and mouth, taking dirty the entire time. I waited until I'd come three times, then pushed him over onto his back and becondomed him. I slicked him with a handful of lube, threw a leg over him, and began to lower my pussy onto the tip of his cock.

Jesus.

I worked the head into my pussy very carefully, then slid slowly down his cock, rocking back and forth until I finally felt myself hit bottom. Well, he hit bottom, anyway. I stayed there, panting a little. I was stretched so wide it almost hurt, and I knew the wrong move would hurt me and fuck the whole thing up.

Gingerly, I began to fuck him. Up and down, feeling him drag at the walls of my pussy until I adjusted. I came quickly and he yelped in complaint. I changed my angle and he whimpered, writhing underneath me. Ooooohhh, fuck, you're going to make me come so fast, I don't wanna come this fast, you're so fucking tight, ooh, ooh..

I pried myself off him and got on my knees, my head cradled in my folded arms. Try this. You can drive. He carefully stuffed his cock into me from behind and began to rock against me. The angle wasn't as good for me, but it was still good. Unfortunately for him, it was no less tight, and he came with a yell of protest. Which was actually fine with me, as I don't think I could have gone a whole lot longer with that thing inside me.

The smallest cock I've ever fucked was attached to the largest man I've ever fucked. I enjoyed riding him in a reverse cowgirl, sclamping my PC muscles around him for all I was worth. He was just the right size to hit my G spot, and with that and the squeezing and playing with ym clit I could come and come and come. Unfortunately, despite condoms and pills, he was extremely paranoid about pregnancy and would throw me bodily off of him whenever he came, occasionally dumping me completely off the [bed, couch, easy chair] and pissing me off thoroughly. And it turned him on when I came, so this would frequently utterly fuck up my orgasms. The cock was great! The guy was a jackass. See, no correlation between penis size and social ability.

So there. I speak the truth; size is irrelevant. I have no reason to lie to you. Learn to use what you've got, learn to enjoy what he's got, and quit obsessing!